I don’t usually like to put the personal aspects of my life out in the open for people to speculate on. I prefer to keep certain things about myself private and only share with a select few friends. However, I’ve been noticing things about myself recently. Up until this past November I was in a nearly three year long relationship, I mentioned in an earlier post that it ended pretty badly. At the time I did not see how I could possibly ever be okay again. This boy had been such a huge part of my life for so long. I’d spent all this time letting him love me and loving him that I did not remember how to love myself.
I went to a very bad place both mentally and emotionally for quite some time. To be perfectly honest during the last five months of the relationship I was already partially in that bad place. Somehow it got worse once it actually ended, even though it was a long time coming. I tried so hard to get him to stay with me, that in and of itself was damaging. I let him walk all over me all in an attempt to make him happy. I didn’t value myself, I didn’t think I was worth anything without him. It took several friends, many months and removing him from every aspect of my life for me to get to the point I am at now. Continue reading “I’m Okay Now”